What I am Thankful For

I never really used to like Thanksgiving. I mean I like to eat good food and sometimes throw back a few cold ones, but I just didn’t get what the big deal was about it. I think that part of it had to do with my smug liberal intellectual complex. But then again, maybe I had a point. I mean we thanked the Indians by killing them and taking their land, and then created a Holiday celebrating that. It sounds like a cruel joke.

But I think that at the end of the day, I used to not like Thanksgiving because I felt like I had nothing to be thankful for. I found it so corny how people would do all these cheesy ass testimonials about what they are thankful for. It would go something like, In these times, yadda yadda, at this time of year, yadda yadda, thankful, yadda yadda, our health, yadda yadda, friends, yadda yadda family. And now, it’s a cold day in hell, because I feel this certain urge to embrace the bask and glow of cheesy triteness.

So today, I had a sudden urge to call or IM all of my friends and wish them a Happy Thanksgiving. I have never done this before. Yet for some reason, I felt overwhelmed with emotion. I thought back to about a year ago, when I felt like Napoleon in the middle of Russia. I had won battles only to find out that there was no prize. There was just a bunch of shit burning all around me and I couldn’t see through the smoke and the flames, but I certainly felt the heat and choked on the fumes.

Now I feel like I’ve conquered the world. The March on Rome started a little over a year ago. I was walking around in the middle of New York City with my best friend and his co-worker. We were both miserable for quite some time but didn’t know how to talk about it. I shut him out of my life because I was ashamed at how I was feeling. We had a talk that we should have had a long time ago. I came out of it knowing that I had someone who was important in my life who saw in me what I never saw in myself. We have never had a fight. We have never been on bad terms. I think that it is because, at the end of the day, we understand each other and are brutally honest, but it never hurts, because we know, at the end of the day, we have each other’s best interests at heart, and we will not stop a conversation until each side is understood. Eeven if we don’t agree, we validate each other’s points of view and learn from each other. I am thankful every day that I have a friend like that, and I don’t know how people who don’t have friends like that can survive.

I am also thankful to all the other people that have come into my life or came back into my life in the past year.

An eccentric and loving College student with great wit and an unbelievable obsession with the keeper. I feel loved every time that I see her and her family.

A spunky aspiring Luthier who is like a sister to me and has an uncanny ability to put a smile on my face, even after telling me when I’m being an asshole. In the Dictionary, under cool chick, there is no definition, just her name and a picture.

A group of redneck seminary students who I am convinced coined the term “praise the Lord and pass the ammunition”. They have helped me find some semblance of spirituality in my life. They got this liberal to visit a Church and consider the glories of shooting perfectly beautiful and defenseless animals. Plus they drink beer, smoke Cigars, and their wives can cook there asses off.

A witty writing teacher who is never afraid to throw back a few cold ones and talk about the glories of Democratic politics, Jazz, or the French New Wave. My love and understanding of many things can be attributed to him.

A neighbor, who I swear to God is the basis for the character Ned Flanders. He always makes me Lattes and we argue about politics. He is a Republican, not that there’s anything wrong with that.

A scruffy programmer who bows to the alter of anything Wesley Clark. He taught me a lot about programming and always has an interesting saying to throw out, like, “Life is either boredom or suffering.”

A total Metal head who is just completely intense about everything. He has been a mentor to me in my career, and he is never afraid of telling me some hard things that I have to hear.

A crazy Ward Leader who I think sometimes is more of an angry Black man than I am, and he’s White. He taught me everything I know about local politics in a practical sense.

A guy that I grew up with who wants to become a Lawyer, because, after all, the Jewish population at Penn is dwindling, isn’t it? He helps me to remember where I came from.

A set of couples, both of the wives being musicians. They have let me into their world and helped me really appreciate who I am.

A web programmer who has a keg that is always filled in his house. He has taught me a lot of lessons about life over pints of beer.

Then there all the communities that have opened up and let me in. There are my Mt. Airy peeps. There are my theatre buddies. Who could not forget my fellow Deaniacs. And then there are the random people who you meet on the fringes of these groups. You don’t hang out with them but wind up seeing them from time to time, and they manage to just make you feel good about yourself.

All of these people, including, last, but not least, my awesome parents are what I am thankful for this year. They have all been a part of helping me become the person who I am now, and they will all be a part of me becoming the person who I want to be.

I’ve had a crazy year this year, with it’s smoke filled Dive Bars, Salsa classes, deep conversations about Reformed Theology, powwows with the “Liberal Elite”, Theatre, and now programming for people who make kick ass signs.

Thanks to you all, and happy holidays.